Well, this week marks the one year anniversary of my weight loss adventure. I lost 2 toddlers in 9 months (well, not literally, of course, but the weight of 2…ok nevermind – bad analogy)… I lost SEVENTY POUNDS. I’ve waited months to write this “anniversary” post…and during those months, I unfortunately found a few of the pounds I lost. But, that’s ok. For the most part, I’m in check and holding fairly steady. And, I’ve promised myself to never go back to “that place” again. So, I went back on my “healthy lifestyle” this week. Jared is joining me this time (he’s three days in and I think he’s sprouting horns, but I’ll feed him carbs tomorrow and he’ll be happier). 
I’d lost weight for pageants before, and we’d lost weight (otherwise known as getting whipped by a trainer named "Adolphus" - see early blog posts) before I got pregnant, but this was a whole different ballgame. This wasn’t a “eat right and exercise for a month and you’ll look fine on stage in a swimsuit” kind of diet. I had years of weight to lose…law school, desk job, baby weight and post-baby working mom weight. It was daunting. And, by the way, I have a bone to pick with whoever said I’d lose the baby weight breastfeeding. (Unless they mean, “you’ll lose the weight actually put on a normal person from being pregnant” – not the weight you gain during pregnancy from being a cheese fry eating machine- they should be more clear). Either way, I call BS on it. it’s just a way to convince you to perform the tasks of a dairy cow…and I fell for it. But, after a year, I realized I was no smaller. Charlie was on his own. I digress… 
Most people ask me, “what prompted you to do this?” Easy answer: Shame. Since none of you are apparently good enough friends to tell me, straight up, that I was a fat ass, I had to figure it out on my own. I started not recognizing myself in photographs - or in the mirror – that should have been enough. Then, when saddle shopping, I realized my saddle size was unpopular – because most people don’t NEED that big of a size. But, I waited until the full shame factor slapped me in the face. Unfortunate set of facts #1: Last spring, I was handling a trip/fall case at an apartment complex and during a case related telephone conference, the subject came up that the claimant was a “big ol’ fat woman.” She broke a concrete step. She weighed less than me. Unfortunate set of facts #2: A few weeks later, I had another trip/fall case and my boss asked me “why do big women insist on wearing ridiculous high heels?” I was also quite a bit larger than that Plaintiff….and looked under my desk, immediately after his comment, to admire my favorite Cole Haan pumps. Then, the thought crossed my mind that apparently I was a former pageant girl in the body of a “big ol’ fat woman.” Our old trainer used to say, “you’re not fat, you just need to ‘uncover your fine’”. Yep…something like that. 
I think Jared was too sweet (this is an unusual occurrence for him, but he is sensitive to weight related issues, which I love about him) and Charlie just liked me “fluffy” for cuddling purposes. I also blame my own blinders…I should have realized that when my family would say, “you’re pretty no matter what size you are,” I should have realized they were saying, “you’re a pretty fat girl.” I missed the cues. But, friends, seriously?? You’ll tell me if I have broccoli in my teeth, baby spit up down the back of my shirt, a split in my pants, toilet paper on my shoe, or a run in my hose, but NONE OF YOU bothered to tell me I was FAT? Thanks. I’ll remember that the next time I see your fly unzipped.
I’d heard some radio commercials about a local weight loss program, Slim 4 Life, so I called. I knew I’d get a sales pitch, but as I told them when I went for my consultation, “I don’t care if you tell me to eat vanilla flavored dog crap and jump around with a monkey on my head…make me thin and I’ll do it!” And, pound by pound, and week by week, they did! I won’t go all infomercial on you, but basically, it’s a sensible program – veggies, fruits and lean protein. I told them I’d eat right, but had minimal time to exercise (and preferred that my exercise be accomplished on the back of a horse, not in a gym). I wanted to eat out some. I wanted grocery store food. They made all of that happen. I won’t lie…it was expensive. But, it WORKED. I was hitting my milestones, staying motivated, and by Christmas, I was at goal weight. 70 pounds thinner and right at SIX full clothes sizes down. Without giving away the details, I used to wear a size closer to my age…now I wear a size closer to Charlie’s age. That rocks. And, I rewarded myself with a pair of Dubarry boots and a new-to-me reining saddle in a popular seat size! I’ve also had to replace 75% of my wardrobe (and threw in some new shoes and new chaps – 2 sizes smaller – for good measure). The key to continued success: I got rid of ALL of my larger clothes (all to wonderful charities).
I’ve realized a couple of things on this journey: (1) if you want to lose weight bad enough, you’ll make the sacrifices necessary and (2) weight loss really is a never-ending journey and DOES need to be a lifestyle change. My goals were to go to the beach in May unafraid of wearing a swimsuit and to wear a “sexy” dress to my brother-in-law’s wedding. DONE. But, the Florida key lime pie and Kentucky wedding cake are still lingering, so it’s time to hit the program again.
We’re three days back in and Jared was nearly in tears last night begging for a bowl of cereal around midnight. I was not hungry, but still maintain that I’m the tougher one of the two of us. I think Jared believes I’ve chosen to follow this nutrition plan for the sole purpose of secretly and slowly torturing him. I’ll insert my sinister laugh here. :-)
So...THE LONG AWAITED BEFORE AND AFTER PICTURES...
DRUM ROLL PLEASE....
BEFORE: AFTER:
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| Left: Mandy's wedding in February 2012 Right: Jordan's wedding in June 2013 |
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| Left: Memorial Day 2012 Right: Memorial Day 2013 |
